Time flies when you don't do shit

Losing my internet access, yo - so check it...

Dumped my girlfriend.
Moving into a place where I'll have to live with one other person. Change is good (so they tell me).
Should I reconsider teaching overseas?
It would be wrong to fool around with someone I work with, plus she's much younger than me, but I really want to. SHOULD NOT DO IT. Which means I probably will.
What am I going to do with my life? Should I try to get a job with the city? Decent steady check with crazy benefits.
Should I try to work more at the bar, work behind the bar more? More money, for sure, but it takes so much out of me. I'm here to tell ya, I'm not a kid anymore!
There's always Seattle, which up until now I think I've avoided because of my family. What's fucked up is that it almost seems like the right thing to do is to leave and have shit work out itself. Honestly, I don't know how to fix things.
So - stay here. Work more at current job(s). Stay here and get a new job. Move to Seattle and get a new job. Go overseas and totally go through a life change. What the fuck, people? Help a brother out, America! Love you, mean it...

Chamon!

My best friend is getting married in June and I'm the best man. Don't know anything about planning bachelor parties. He's a cop with many beefeating cop friends. Don't have any money. Fucked, basically.

My sister is ill, mentally and physically. Opened accounts in my name, ran them up, and now I'm responsible.

My girlfriend has become more of a handful than I think I can manage. Lots of issues. Cheif of which seems to be that I won't move into her falling-down house with her, since she needs a roommate and all.

Oh, yeah, I gotta move. Been house sitting for months now and my benefactor is coming back. She's going to commute from Mass to Utah. Lot of sense there, I know.

Other than all that, things are great, thanks for asking. I'll always love you...

Hi, how are you?

I'm house-sitting for a friend who has up and jumped to london. Beautiful condo - now falling apart. So much snow in the past two weeks and now heavy rain has made every window on the second floor fucking leak like the Titanic. Great fun, everyone. It's like having a puppy. I have to come home every six hours to check for leaks. Not what I call convienent.
I told my girlfriend of three months that I loved her last night. I think it's mainly because she loves to touch me and she seems super content with me - warts and all. When you get to be my age, young pup, shit like that matters.

Fuck the title

Let me ask you something. Is it wrong that I'm so far removed from the technology loop? It's starting to bother me, I think, and it never used to. I like record albums. I do. Couple of drinks and then it's scratchy Tom Waits, Tom Petty, Tom-Tom Club, etc... It's friggin great. I think it tweaks the historian in me. And cassettes I'm down with as well. You can still buy a mini boom-box for twenty bucks or so and make mix-tapes. And I got a million cds, but even that now is becoming out of fashion. Must everything be digital?
I sent an email to my friend. She responded via "blackberry." What the fuck. I read one of my favorite blogs (Raymi), and she's got a book for sale and links up the shitter, facebook, blah blah blah. I just want to know if I'm in the wrong. If I am, will someone friggin tell me, please?

Tony Pierce and Raymi

I'm going to say that my first real check-my-email-everyday internet access happened when I went back to school. My best friend told me to check out Tony Pierce. I do believe the term "blog" was in the lexicon of the time, but if so, just barely. Anyhoo...blew my mind. Funny and irreverant, clever clever clever. Fast forward a passel of years later. Tony's freind Raymi comes up again and again. Stunning does not begin to describe a thing about her, but we have to start with something. And writing, photography, etc...www.raymitheminx.com, I think. My point in all this is this:
A few years ago I had an issue, or issues, with something Tony had written. Not bad things, per se, but I needed clarification. He wrote me back right away. That said something to me. I wrote to Raymi about something the other day and....tadah! Thanks, Raymi, for taking the time. Look upon her with mucho caution personas...muy especial...y dangerosa!!!!

Paper

Are we ever going to run out of paper? You can tell me if we are. Every damn night when I empty out my pockets I've got receipts from getting gas, the atm, bars I work at, bars I frequent, gum, etc...

I write my schedule on a little slip of paper. I'll write a wee note to myself or someone else. I've got little scraps of paper friggin everywhere. I'm sorry. I've just noticed it. It's ridiculous. I love you so much, it hurts.

Tattoos

Girls, please, listen to me. For just a second. Please. You're killing me with the tattoos. Since when did getting a tattoo become like getting a set of lungs: gotta start with two? When did become the standard? Years ago it was the tiny nose ring stud. EVERY girl had one (especially at ZooMass), but it was college, hey, rebel against society, your parents, it's the happy valley, NIN, I'm from Beverly (don't hold it against me...or my angst)...
It's ink, now, people. The difference is that now it's a bit more permanent. What's fucked up is that you HAVE to live up to it now. You must become and never deviate from the person in the moment that you were when you went under the needle. And you may be nowhere close to that person now, but you're shackled by that image that you had burned into your skin. If you did time...Okay. If you were in a war...Okay. Those are times that need permanent markings. But the small of the back (okay, mostly I think it's sexy, but don't you understand that it's only for right now! Not when you're forty and at the bar! But it will still be there, don't you get it? For fuck's sake!), but the ankle/back of the neck/ side of the torso, etc... have a little vision, foresight, is all I'm saying. Strangers will see your ink and immediately form opinions about you, not all of them good. You can say that you don't care about that, you don't care what people think. The only opinions that matter are the ones of the people that know you. Well, you know what, you trend-follower, (but still intense and hardcore because you went under the needle), THEY ALREADY KNOW YOU! If they are your friends you don't have to prove anything to them. God, is this nursery school? Do I have to explain everything? I'm a friggin' dummy, a dummy people! And yet this is as common sense as it gets...And I'm in the minority!

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You got me going. And I'm sorry. I love you. I do. Don't get that tattoo. Please. For the love of God,...